DS Phone

[fourarms]

I'd be worried in case he's sending pics back to her as I just heard of a case recently where a young guy was being blackmailed because of pics sent to a "girl" he had met on a dating site

[Mrs Yarn]

I’ll put my house on it that he’ll say it is a friends phone.

Is there a chance he used a second phone because he didn’t want you seeing it. Do u check his own phone?

That was my first thought. My brother always said the cigarettes in his room were his friend’s

[MrsPotatoHead]

It could be an offense under Coco's Law. I think I'd want to get proper advice, whether from the guards or not, before going any further with it.

[DiscoGirl]

I hope you told your dh that admitting to looking at his phone is the least of your worries , very tough situation to be in , would you have a chat with your local community Garda ?

A 16 year old boy has pics of a girl in a crop top and one topless one. It's not what you'd class hardcore pornography
I'm not really getting the need for a chat with the local community Garda? Why? Am I missing something?
I think Nov21's advice is really useful. He may have been sent them by a girl he knows /is seeing? .The second phone needs an explanation and definitely a serious chat re sharing intimiate images online etc.
But I wouldn't be jumping to mad conclusions and consulting a Garda because my 16 yr old son had a picture of a topless girl on his phone. I would be talking to my son.

She was looking for advice, my suggestion was exactly that just a suggestion , not a direct order, and im sure her son has an innocent answer as to why he has 2 phones and such photos

[HeyJude]

Yes one of my brothers was great for "minding stuff" for other people

I would have a chat along the lines of what is mentioned above. I would want to know why he has a second phone and where he got it( I don't think minding it for a friend would have any traction in regards to a phone).
I'd ask him straight out about the photos, where he got them, does he know the girl, how old she was and why did she send him pictures or who sent them? I'd also ask him if he sent any back.
I'd try not to be confrontational but instead concerned.

I still don't understand asking the guards?

[DiscoGirl]

Community Gardai are there to help people are they not?

[CocoRose]

I honestly think a community guard has more to be doing than chatting to a mother about something as basic as this.

[DiscoGirl]

Maybe so , but as I already mentioned , just a suggestion

[CocoRose]

I didn't mean for that to sound smart, which it might. I just thinking out loud about at 16 a sexy photo isn't that big a deal but yes the potential issues are important to chat through, altho I do think it's likely he knows that. I think it's unlikely to be an issue and just no harm him having a policy of not storing this type of thing sent to him, defo never forward it on etc.

[Jumping Bean]

My concern would be that your ds doesn’t know this girl and the pics are doing the rounds amongst his peer group without the girl knowing. Maybe that’s where the community guard needs to be involved.

If it’s your ds’s girlfriend and they are sharing pics it still needs a conversation like suggested above.

[HeyJude]

I would find out if he knows her first and how he got the photos, and what age she is.

Depending on the answers to those questions, then it may be necessary to contact the Garda on the girls behalf.

I'd also have a chat with him about respect (not the correct word but hopefully you know what I mean) for girls etc.

[luxie]

My concern would be that your ds doesn’t know this girl and the pics are doing the rounds amongst his peer group without the girl knowing. Maybe that’s where the community guard needs to be involved.

If it’s your ds’s girlfriend and they are sharing pics it still needs a conversation like suggested above.

Or that the phone is doing the rounds either.

Under coco’s law that would be a major issue. No harm to give a Garda a call.

I know the community guard is coming to the secondary school to discuss it with all years

ETA: when I say no harm, I mean as in ring or not , they’re there to help so up to parent to make the call. Sometimes advice is needed from a professional . Depending on the sons reply with be a guide

[Apple]

If the guards were involved in every case of this the country would come to a standstill.

[luxie]

Oh I know that too. But teens prob aren’t aware of cocos law etc

[Happymammy]

I'm guessing your son used the second phone to take a picture of the pictures on his main phone, before deleting them from that one. I wouldn't be contacting the community guard at this stage, there is no reason to until you talk to your son. Novbaby and janeymacs advice was good, chat to him and take it from there. Making him aware of the issues that could arise from sharing intimate pics of himself or resharing this girls pics without her consent would be my priority.