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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 12:30 pm 
I have been working for the same firm for approx.14 months. It is a huge, well known firm. I love my job, very flexible, etc. and I love the team I am with. My direct Manager however, is unnerving. :crazy1: He is the same age as me (46). I work with a lot of female trainees and they find his behaviour off putting but they tend to avoid him.

He constantly stares at our chests/backsides if we have to go to his office, which we avoid. I tend to let it go over my head but his behaviour is becoming extremely off putting. Am concerned for the female trainees also (on a personal level, they do not report to me in any way). One of them in particular is quite upset by it and no longer wants to go to his office.

Last week, the top button of my shirt was open. He commented on it and "said, ah leave it open"....I said "what did you say"? and gave him a glare. He certainly got from my tone that I wasn't impressed. However, it is still bugging me. I had to email him yesterday to follow up on something that was outstanding.....his reply was "what's it worth"??? I ignored it. There is always stupid/smutty innuendos which I ignore and he'll say "ah sure, we gotta laugh".......

He is well aware that I am not willing to engage in any of this bullshit. He has commented to me "how can he be expected to concentrate on his work with these young ones walking around in skinny jeans" (dress down Friday :roll: ). I have replied, "are you really saying that"?? I get a vibe that he is trying to "challenge" me or something.

He is here over 25 years. I have told another member of staff that his behaviour is disgusting but the response I get is, ah, he is harmless, etc.....


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 1:08 pm 
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I'd report that. He is way out of line.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 1:12 pm 
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Disgusting individual. This is the sort of mysoginistic crap that we shouldn't have to put up with. I'd report him too. Without a doubt.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 1:17 pm 
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Report him asap. Nobody should have to be leered at like that.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 1:27 pm 
I have a feeling one of my younger colleagues will report him. She has now got to the stage where she will not participate in dress down Fridays due to his leers, etc. She gave me the impression she would like me to back her up, which I will.

What bothers me is, his behaviour seems to be tolerated. He is "unofficially" barred from Xmas work parties, due to his behaviour. Complaints have obviously been made about him in the past, yet he is still here.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 1:36 pm 
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He's only getting away with it because no one will report his disgusting behaviour. Report him.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 1:52 pm 
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Note every single inappropriate action or comment that you are witness or party to and report. Encourage the other women to do the same. It is easy for the men who have worked with him for years to say he is harmless, I wouldn't like to test that.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 1:58 pm 
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It is is a huge firm I'm assuming they have a HR department. That's where I'd start. As molls said, document each thing - he's making it easy for you if he's including examples in writing. This is not joking, not fun, not harmless and not acceptable.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 2:02 pm 
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If someone is making the working environment uncomfortable then they are not harmless. It doesn't matter if he is to quote a friend 'all mouth and no trousers'. Has he ever been reported either officially or by having a quiet word with his manager/HR? Are people afraid of reporting him or pulling him up on it because he has been there so long? Talk to your colleagues and see if there is a possibility of a few of you visiting HR for a chat and document and keep all emails etc.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 2:08 pm 
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CockChoker wrote:
He's only getting away with it because no one will report his disgusting behaviour. Report him.


Agree 100% with this.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 2:34 pm 
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Document and date everything that he is saying. Keep a record of everything that is going on and report him. He's out of line here and should be reported immediately to HR.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 2:46 pm 
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Get a copy of your organisation’s Sexual Harassment procedure and see what is involved in making a complaint and then follow that.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 3:04 pm 
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report him to HR. He is a liability to the firm - and an utter creep.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 3:11 pm 
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In light of the me too publicity I would like to think the company wouldn't like this to get out into the public domain especially if senior management and HR turn a blind eye to this letch and his disgusting behaviour.


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 27, 2018 3:14 pm 
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If it’s a huge company they will have a HR dept and probably also a compliance team. They will have mechanisms to deal with this kind of situation, so use them .

But, the company cannot take any action until someone is found to be in breach of a policy like B&H, or dignity at work, or whatever it’s called in your organization .
Only way they can conclude that, is to conduct a thorough investigation.
And, they cannot launch an investigation until someone puts a complaint in writing.

I would strongly encourage you to be that someone.

Typical process is as follows:
Think of various incidences where there were witnesses.
request a meeting with your HRBP
Bring notes to the meeting, and recount the various incidences that bothered you, listing any (possible) witnesses.
Recount any stories you have heard , confirming who said what. You do not need to speak with anyone else beforehand, and check if they will verify your statement, you just give your account, and it’s up t them to do the honorable thing and give their own truthful account.
You will then be asked to formalize your complaint in writing.
HRBP will inform the perpetrator that a complaint has been received, what it is about and the process that will ensue.
The HrBP will convene an investigation panel , and you and everyone you mentioned will be interviewed.
If any other possible witness names come up during those meetings, those additional people will also be included, and asked to give their account.
At the end of it all, there will be a clear picture on what kind of behavior is going on.

Do consider it, and don’t wait for someone else to do it.

I have managed these kinds of processes, so if you wish pm me.


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