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PostPosted: Thu Mar 29, 2018 11:13 pm 
Without going to a ton of detail. My dh has been suffering what i believe is anxiety problems. I am trying my best to help him but he sees all his issues are being caused by me. He has got it into his head that i have cheated on him for absolutely no reason. He is being completely unreasonable. Not matter what I say or do I am wrong and everything is a reason to be suspicious of me. He is questioning me day and night about everything from the thoughts in my head to every interaction i have with people, everything thing i do.

On one hand I can see he is not well, dr has prescriped meds but on the other hand i feel like a punching bag(not literally). I am exhausted morning to night i am accused of things and constantly interrogated. I feel paralysed as everything i say or do is worng. He seems completely paranoid and I have no idea on next steps. When he doesnt find anything I did wrong it seems to make him more determined that i am guilty of something i don't think he even knows what but he is hurting so I must be the cause. Any advice from someone in my position or someone who was in his and has come out the other side.

Please don't quote me as dh likely to stumble here too on his quest.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 12:25 am 
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Guest my heart goes out to you. That is not a tenable relationship long-term. How long has he been on the meds? ie have they had time to work already and he is still behaving like this, or has he just started on them so there is the hope that in a few weeks he will see sense?


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 7:57 am 
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He sounds paranoid with delusional beliefs. This is different to anxiety and depression and is treated with different medication. I would return to the GP who should be referring him for an urgent Psychiatric assessment.

I hope you're ok, have you family support and someone you can confide in? It is very stressful for you as much as for him.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 8:34 am 
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As above, that is not anxiety that he has. It sounds like paranoid delusions. A family member is bipolar and she has paranoid delusions when she is ill. You need to see your gp and get your dh assessed. You also need support. Tell your family and friends and his family too. Our family member had to get to a very bad place before her family realised how much she needed help. Please look after yourself and try to get your dh help asap. Take care


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 10:05 am 
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Does he allow you visit the GP with him? If so you need to go back with him and describe the symptoms and behaviour as soon as you can.

If not then you need to visit his GP separately, outline that you understand that he cannot discuss your DH's medical treatment with you but that you have information that is pertinent to his treatment and condition that you need to share. A good GP will listen and this on board although they will not be able to discuss anything with you without your DH's consent.

I am going to ask something, I don't intend it to frighten you but it is important that you make an assessment of your own safety. Is your DH's behaviour escalating in a way that scares you or makes you concerned for your own safety? Really think about this and consider that if the answer to any of that is yes then then call the GP and explain everything and ask for their help in navigating next steps.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 10:34 am 
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I second everything novbaby has said. I know our instinct in these situations is to protect our partner from outside scrutiny but please confide in people so they know what is going on.
This sounds like more than anxiety. I think it’s time to consider your own health and I assume you have children too.
He is unwell. But that doesn’t mean you have to accept this as your life.
Go to your own GP today for support. Don’t hide anything from him.
Take care. If you think any one here can support you please reach out.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 11:21 am 
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Excellent advice for the others. It definitely sounds like more than depression and anxiety.

I would definitely speak to his gp as soon as you can. As others said they won't discuss it with you but a good gp will listen and take take what you said seriously. But as Amber said even just go and talk to the gp for yourself and get advice.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 12:39 pm 
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I would speak to your gp and tell them what is happening.
You have to look after you. It is soul destroying to listen to that day in day out.
Your priority needs to be you.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 30, 2018 4:12 pm 
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What novbaby said. Tell people what's happening and if you think you can safely, I'd consider leaving for your safety and well being - at least until he's treated and under control.


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