Meeting someone after breakup
Re: Meeting someone after breakup
Ah, enjoy the here and now Tinky, a few dates will be good for you either way, all part of the getting back out there process.
Re: Meeting someone after breakup
Exactly. He’s lovely and happy to spend time with him when we can with 5 kids between us (he’s very hands on, wish he was MY ex H:)) I like more things than I dislike, it’s just the dislike ones are really annoying:)
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Re: Meeting someone after breakup
I wouldn't bother meeting him again if there are already some things about him that really annoy you!Tinky wrote:I like more things than I dislike, it’s just the dislike ones are really annoying:)
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Re: Meeting someone after breakup
Obviously. I just mean I wouldn't be bothered spending time with someone I find annoying. Maybe you don't mind.Tinky wrote:I’m not marrying him!
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Re: Meeting someone after breakup
He’s not annoying, he’s lovely - just a couple of things he does are annoying and would stop me wanting something long term with him even if I wanted that. I don’t feel I’ll be wasting my time hanging out with him and having fun though.
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Re: Meeting someone after breakup
No you definitely wouldn’t be wasting your time. We all have annoying habits whether we believe that or not - and we are all annoyed by different things. And sometimes we can surprise ourselves by not being annoyed or at least being less annoyed by certain things over time. I think we can learn something from everyone so if you enjoy his company I can’t see how it would be a waste of time meeting again.
I do wonder as well as we age do we become super fussy and hyper critical. When I think back to my twenties there’s a tonne of stuff I wouldn’t have cared about that would bug me now.
I do wonder as well as we age do we become super fussy and hyper critical. When I think back to my twenties there’s a tonne of stuff I wouldn’t have cared about that would bug me now.
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Re: Meeting someone after breakup
I wonder though if you spent more time together would you convince yourself the annoying things were not that big a deal.Tinky wrote:He’s not annoying, he’s lovely - just a couple of things he does are annoying and would stop me wanting something long term with him even if I wanted that. I don’t feel I’ll be wasting my time hanging out with him and having fun though.
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Re: Meeting someone after breakup
It could go either way - the things could annoy me more! They aren’t huge things and would be easily sorted if I said something. Anyway I don’t think either of us are ready for anything too serious so being on the same wavelength there is very important. He is an excellent dad and spends loads of time with his kids and of course I live with mine so there isn’t a lot of time for anyone else.
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- EmilyBronte
Re: Meeting someone after breakup
I think this is possible! It depends on what you want though and on how good you are at avoiding emotional entanglement.EmilyBronte wrote:I wonder though if you spent more time together would you convince yourself the annoying things were not that big a deal.Tinky wrote:He’s not annoying, he’s lovely - just a couple of things he does are annoying and would stop me wanting something long term with him even if I wanted that. I don’t feel I’ll be wasting my time hanging out with him and having fun though.
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I think I’ve actually grown more tolerant with age rather than less.
Re: Meeting someone after breakup
It's great you had a good time and got on well. You must be chuffed you've dipped your toe back in. Good luck with it all whatever way things work out.
Re: Meeting someone after breakup
It’s just nice to get the odd text or call during the day/eve checking in to see how I am or asking what I’m up to - I didn’t realise how much I’d missed that feeling of being cared for even if it is still pretty superficial. Someone thinking about you is a great confidence boost and I’m reluctant to give that up with someone I do genuinely enjoy spending time with because I don’t like everything about them.
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Re: Meeting someone after breakup
Do we ever like everything about someone? I think once you like a lot more than you dislike and the things you dislike are not game changers like say meanness or rudeness it’s worth giving someone a chance.
Re: Meeting someone after breakup
Yes he’s definitely not mean or rude. Nothing that couldn’t be sorted. I’m just not at the stage where I care enough to bother.
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Re: Meeting someone after breakup
Sounds like nice, pleasant, stress free way to dip your toe back in the dating waters. Best of luck with it.
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