Only One Not Promoted

[angelika]

I would not send that email. You’d sound delusional

This. Do people really do this kind of thing?

What I described above is a known technique to negotiate a pay rise:
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfr ... CMP=twt_fd


Does it work? Yes, according to studies. Whether anyone would want to do it is another matter.

Strangely, that article doesn't appear to mention requesting a meeting to discuss details of a promotion you've been told you're not getting.

[LucyS]

Have you done it?

I stand over my comment .

No.

But I am aware of someone who did it. She was in a similar situation to the OP and had worked 10+years in the company. Finding another job was not an option.

It worked. The company was bought out shortly afterwards (this probably explained why they didn't bother promoting her) and senior management removed. She is now a Regional VP.

[Sally]

That study appears to be about negotiating a pay rise, which is a different thing altogether.
So, saying something like “ I look forward to getting the pay rise next month” might have some merit.
Likewise, looking them in the eye and saying “I suggest you reconsider” with its implied threat to resign if they don’t pay you more , again might have some merit. Only if you’re willing to follow through of course….

But the OP is referring to being promoted to a more senior position.
She was told she was not being promoted so sending a mail now cheerily saying “I look forward to my promotion “ would absolutely come across as delusional. The manager who told her she was not being promoted would think “WTF? Did she not hear what I was telling her??”
And looking them in the eye and saying “I suggest you reconsider” would come across menacing, and sound like you were threatening a law suit on them or something.

Again, wouldn’t go down well with any manager or organisation that I’ve been in or supported.

[WineAndRosesAndGin]

Have you done it?

I stand over my comment .

No.

But I am aware of someone who did it. She was in a similar situation to the OP and had worked 10+years in the company. Finding another job was not an option.

It worked. The company was bought out shortly afterwards (this probably explained why they didn't bother promoting her) and senior management removed. She is now a Regional VP.

Well good for her because in decades working that is the first time I have heard of someone making threats and being successful. Perhaps you have misinterpreted what playing hardball involves.it doesn't involve giving someone long stares while you assert your perceived right to a promotion

[StarryNight]

It sounds like a very American mindset. Even in US companies here I can't see it going across well to sort of "manifest" a promotion or pay rise via eyeballing someone senior in a meeting.

[WineAndRosesAndGin]

It sounds like a very American mindset. Even in US companies here I can't see it going across well to sort of "manifest" a promotion or pay rise via eyeballing someone senior in a meeting.

Having worked in a few American companies I can confirm you're right. Even in places where being ballsy is encouraged, that's a bit much

[HydrangeaQueen]

It sounds like a very American mindset. Even in US companies here I can't see it going across well to sort of "manifest" a promotion or pay rise via eyeballing someone senior in a meeting.

Having worked in a few American companies I can confirm you're right. Even in places where being ballsy is encouraged, that's a bit much

Sounds like the infamous Burke mindset.

[Kensington]

No I don't think it is an american mindset. having worked for american companies in the US (and dh worked for several) it isn't an approach I am familiar with at all. People absolutely campaign for their promotions with their managers and absolutely complain afterwards though. (Men do this more than women but I am old so that may have changed). But no-one asks for a promotion and then acts like it is a given - that would raise all sorts of red flags. The only person I knew who threatened about a promotion actually was an irish guy in our Irish office. He was made let go afterwards (and boy was it interesting watching the americans grasp the Irish laws of redundancy)

That said, many years ago my manager left suddenly (he was head of our small specialist and essential group). I was put in the position as an interim measure. As I was at all the operations meetings in that capacity, I could hear the senior leaders talking about who to hire in etc - some of them people within the company whom I regarded as having the same if not less experience and skills as I did - and none in our niche area. So I went to the division leaderand said "look I know X left us in a bit of a lurch. Don't worry, every single deliverable will be met by the group - I guarantee it. But if you hire in someone over me I will leave". They gave me the job - and I suspect at the time it was because they knew the group would really struggle if it lost both of us. I was very confident that I was the best person for the job. I believe they discounted me because I had a baby not long before.

[ainm2]

Regardless whether it would work - would you want to work there having achieved a promotion under these circumstances? It would be very uncomfortable, I think the OP has rightly decided this bad blood will not be going away and she needs to make a clean break.

[StarryNight]

It'd be like getting married knowing you had to nag your spouse into it. Not a good way to live.

[Newbody]

Leaving aside whether the OP should demand a promotion, below is my experience.

I found myself in a very similar situation this time last year having given my all to the company and worked well over and above my paid hours for little or no recognition. There was some major restructuring and of all of the staff who were there on a longer term basis, I was the only one not promoted. There was also the added insult that I could see the pay increases across the board as I ran payroll. Everyone else got a pay rise of between 12 and 25% and I was offered 3%

So I spoke to my manager and explained that I felt that the lack of recognition and lack of reward (without mentioning what anyone else had received) did not reflect my commitment to the company and asked that they reconsider or I would have to consider my future with the company.

They wouldn’t budge so I took a leap of faith and resigned.

A month later I had a new role, not ideal at the time but better terms and conditions than I had previously and the sort of flexibility I really needed to keep everything working.

4 months later I was asked to move to a management role with a team reporting to me in an area of the business which utilised all the skills I had previously acquired. At that stage, the pay increase from my previous role was almost 50%

And that’s where I am now. Chaotically busy, at times utterly frustrated, most of the time loving the challenge and sense of achievement but most importantly, I feel my contribution to the company is valued and appreciated and I’m part of a team where we work together and bail each other out when necessary as opposed to a team where any slip up is an opportunity for someone else to make themselves look better!

So I would absolutely recommend leaving the whole sorry mess behind you and looking for something new.

There is plenty of work especially around the operations/production/customer satisfaction/data management areas. It may be that you don’t get the perfect role straight off but if you get yourself into an organisation where they value experience, commitment and a can do attitude there’s always scope to move forwards. You know that your current company doesn’t value you, your experience or your commitment so to me, leaving and finding somewhere that will is an easy choice.

The very best of luck - I’ve no doubt there’s a much more suitable role waiting for you.

[Kensington]

Regardless whether it would work - would you want to work there having achieved a promotion under these circumstances? It would be very uncomfortable, I think the OP has rightly decided this bad blood will not be going away and she needs to make a clean break.

I wouldn't want to work there like that. And certainly not in a small company. But I think a lot of men would be just fine with it. They knew they deserved it, now they've got it, they'll perform, so what. Like we said upthread these people aren't your family or husband or friends. People come and go in a company. you get a promotion and next year there is a new manager who has no idea how you got it. Not like everyone in the family remembering at christmas dinner for the next 30 years that so and so is only married because of whatever.

I think it is a bad strategy though - as in I don't think it will work.

[LucyS]

Newbody, I'm delighted to hear everything worked out well.

It must have been a very stressful situation at the time.

[TCR]

Newbody, I'm delighted to hear everything worked out well.

It must have been a very stressful situation at the time.

I have to admire the way you dealt with all the criticism of your advice to the OP.

I know it would be a very dull forum if everyone agreed. Though sometimes I think is it really necessary to hammer home your disagreement if ten posters before you already made the same point.

[Millie]

I asked for a promotion in my old job. I explained how I was fulfilling all of the criteria (Public sector so had job advertisements required criteria at hand). Didn’t get it.

I left soon after (couldn’t get time off). They didn’t try to accommodate me at all so it was like they wanted me to leave. Little did they know what I did made their lives so much easier & hassle free. I heard feedback from an old colleague a year later (when I was in another post and I now am at the level I was looking for there). Apparently they regretted that I left and wished they had done more for me.

Unfortunately sometimes you have to move on for others to realise your worth. You know it though OP and I wish you the best in your job search. They will be kicking themselves but you actually won’t care because you’ll be in a role you enjoy.

Like a boyfriend breaking your heart: the best revenge is to move on, live well and be happy.