Ghosted by a friend

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Unnamed Poster 8
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Re: Ghosted by a friend

#31 Post by Unnamed Poster 8 »

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RDR
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Re: Ghosted by a friend

#32 Post by RDR »

JulyUser wrote: Tue Jul 12, 2022 4:50 pm RDR, I did try to approach her but she wont acknowledge me let alone talk to me.

Have decided to let it go, I have lost enough sleep over it. Dont think I want to salvage the friendship now. Its sad but probably time to move on.
That is awful. To be so rude :shock: In that case I'd be on the same page as you. There's nothing you can do if someone is literally blanking you.
Flux
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Re: Ghosted by a friend

#33 Post by Flux »

It happened to me many years ago by a close college pal about 5 years post college. Sadly because she cut me off, I also lost contact with our mutual college pals as she was kind of the leader (as sad as that sounds!). I feel like there is an era of my life that is missing as Ive lost all those pals. I understand her reasons as I wasn't the easiest friend at the time and I guess she wasn't very tolerant, but it still really hurt. I came to terms with it in my conscious mind, but strangely I often dream of her and us making up so it seems that it remains unresolved in my subconscious. I am not sure how I would react if I saw her again, but I do wish her well and hope life has been good to her.
janeymac
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Re: Ghosted by a friend

#34 Post by janeymac »

Years ago, a fairly good friend of mine, an old flatmate, had her first baby and sent out a message to everyone that she wasn't going to be contactable for awhile. So I left it a while and then at some point I realised I had left the while too long and I should have been in contact. I wanted to call and explain and hear about her baby etc but because I was so embarrassed, I kept putting it off and days became weeks and weeks became months. . And I just couldn't face it.
A lovely mutual friend told me very kindly that my friend didn't know what had happened with me. I told her and I think she told my friend and then I copped myself on and just called her.
But there was no actual reason, just circumstances.

To the op,I wouldn't waste my energy trying to find a reason as there may not really be one. There are loads of reasons people stop contact that have nothing to do with anything you've done.
Your friend may have stuff going on in her family and simply doesn't want to talk to anyone.
And people do the strangest things sometimes and unless you were inside their head you couldn't understand. So I wouldn't assume you'd done anything
It's upsetting and you want to know the why but the why could be something silly or trivial or embarrassing that your friend would never say.
I haven't personally experienced ghosting but a couple of friends were very hurt by this. One pursued for an explanation and got a daft one. Something that nobody rational would end a friendship for- so getting a reason was meaningless. It clearly wasn't the real reason and left her none the wiser.
I used to say to my friend that her friend was foolish to lose such a good friend and I think so with your friend.
It's sad but unfortunately people can be strange.
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