DH very depressed and angry

[Penny]

Definitely contact the GP. A friend is going through something similiar and got brilliant help from the GP and was referred on straight away for further help as things were far worse than thought. The services are there and still operating.

[Cutiepie]

Poster, I can only talk about being widowed because of suicide. We have no clear reason why dh took his own life. Looking back and only having it pointed out to me, there were small changes in him. I can't say he ever showed signs of depression. But he never talked. Sometimes you could tell that something was bothering him, small things yet he still didn't talk. Even if we had know what was to come, I don't think he'd have spoken to anyone. He was very much old school. I don't know what can help your husband. Personally, I wish mine could see the devastation his suicide left. Our children will be forever without him. They loved him and he loved them. I don't think he could see another way. I don't know why he couldnt have spoken to someone. Is it a man thing, I don't know. Personally, I found attending Pieta house kept me going. You can vent, let go, no-one will judge. Thinking of you both.

[Grasscutter]

Woolly mentioned on another thread how refreshing it was to see Marian Finucane's widower speak about loss - because it is so rare that a man opens up or even can speak about loss.

I don't think any of the men in my life - including my own DS - are really capable of expressing their innermost feelings. It really makes me think Cutiepie - that you, and many women like you, could absolutely never have known what was coming - because it is just so normal for men not to open up when they are suffering inside. I think a lot of high profile men have done some good work in promoting talking about feelings - but we have a very, very long way to go.

[mrsfudge]

Dh has bouts of depression where he just withdraws completely from us. Its very tough. The silence , tension and the lack of joy is awful. He always comes out of it but I just feel I'm on eggshells waiting for the next one.

[JennyC]

Dh has bouts of depression where he just withdraws completely from us. Its very tough. The silence , tension and the lack of joy is awful. He always comes out of it but I just feel I'm on eggshells waiting for the next one.

That’s very hard mrsfudge. Is he getting any help/ does he even know it’s happening? I realised recently that my mood was affecting the whole family. The joylessness was really dragging everyone down. In my case it was hormonal (I think, it’s early days) and hopefully I’m on the way to having it sorted.


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[mrsfudge]

No. I think if I brought it up it would cause a massive row and upset him. I try to be quietly supportive while staying out of his way

[JennyC]

No. I think if I brought it up it would cause a massive row and upset him. I try to be quietly supportive while staying out of his way

I get that. I hope you’re ok.


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