Worried about overweight brother

[Worried Sis]

My brother is very very over weight - morbidly obese. He’s only 30 and has been over weight his adult life. Our Mam dies when he was 19 and he had a bit of weight on him then but it just spirled out of control after that. He eats so much and is kinda obsessed with food. I brought him to the doctor a few years ago as another brother of mine who lived at home with him at the time told me he would stop breathing at night in his sleep. The doctor referred him for a sleep study - and did lots of blood tests on him - but he wouldn’t go for the sleep study and the blood tests came back fine. He did though go to slimming world and lost 7 stone. He has put that back on and then some - I reckon he’d be over 30 stone. I don’t know how his body carries him around and I’m very worried about him. He’s not the most approachable guy and I don’t think he realizes how big he is so will be super offended if I say it to him. He needs a stomach by pass - or something - am worried he is going to die. How do I approach this without getting him annoyed at me? He has a girlfriend- but she wouldn’t be much help I don’t think - I’m approaching him....

[tippexile]

You probably know already that it is up to him. He has done it before, so he can do it again. He knows he is obese but if you go in too hard on him, he will probably fall out with you. He is a grown man and as hard as it is, you have to accept that unless he asks for your help, you can't do anything. I know you are worried about him but you have to let him make the decision as only he can do it.

[Grasscutter]

Personally I think it’s simplistic to say he’s done it before he can do it again- losing the weight is not the real challenge - keeping it off is the real challenge and he hasn’t done that before. But tippexile is right about it being up to him.
No more than if your brother smoked or drank too much there is little you can do other than be supportive. He is an addict - and it’s one of the toughest addictions to have. OurPath is an online programme approved by the NHS -it might be worth him looking at it but it really has to be his decision.

[jagg]

There is a facebook group called A Pinch of Nom. It is a lot of inspirational stories of people who've lost stones and stones of weight. Mostly through SW it must be said. But they needed to do it themselves. I would forget about being afraid to hurt his feelings. He know he is fat. Just tell him straight. You are going to die. I don't want that to happen. I love you. You need to sort out your weight. He needs you to be straight with him. He might not realise how big he is but he knows he is big. He does however need to do it himself. You cannot make him, but you can support him, help him shop and meal plan, or go for walks with him, don't scold him or treat him like a child.