This is interesting coming from him. You're right that doing more than college might well address those feelings. A part-time job can be great as a social and growth opportunity but also for feeling part of the adult world. I don't know what his lecture load is but college often allows students time to do all sorts of things that they don't have time for later. He can make his life move faster by filling it with more than college. Would he join an archery club (do we have shooting ranges for guns?), go parachute jumping, do the things that he thinks would be exciting in the army. A lot of students find the transition to a college social life difficult. Some colleges are tougher going than others, some courses make it very difficult to connect with people because of size and some personalities find it more challenging than others. He has my sympathy on that but there are definitely other things he could be doing to broaden his horizons and to feel like he's living now. If he's thinking of college and a masters before the army then he should do himself the favour of getting the most from those college years. Life is too short to put 4-6 years on hold.Upset wrote: ↑Tue Feb 14, 2023 11:53 amSaid life is moving too slow, college is boring. He just want life to move onto the exciting stuff. He needs a part time job and some hobbies and social life. He is very shy and finds social situations difficult and just spends his time at home or with us. He doesnt go out and just chats to his friends from school online. Im trying to encourage him but its difficult. I do think if he managed to push himself more socially he might not be as bored.
It is good that he talked to you. While he is legally an adult he is dealing with a new situation with the hamstringing of having a non-adult brain and very little experience of anything so being willing to talk things out is great. Hopefully you can keep the pathways to conversation open. It isn't about you directing him to do what you think is good or bad, but about him being able to talk out and work out what is right for him. Your input can be valuable without being the be-all-and-end-all iykwim.
While you can't make him do any of the things you think might help you may well be right that his discontent is because his range of activities is so limited. Maybe the army seems like it will package excitement for him iykwim.