heymammy.com

It sounds really bizarre for 6 out of a group of 8 to turn on two others like that.
If you look back with hindsight were there ever any previous indications that they'd all behave with a pack mentality like this?
Could there be something else going on with the other friend that you aren't privy too that originally drove that weird message in the group? Was the message put there accidentally and you commenting has been considered as highlighting the situation?
What age are these women, it doesn't sound like typical behaviour for any group of women to all turn on their friends like this?

They are probably all bitching about one another as well .... they were caught out (as in text would probably not have been sent if sober) .... so I would imagine over the course of time there has been little snide comments passed between them about each other . All very shallow. It doesn't of course make things hurt any less. But 8 know who I would like as a friend ! You can hold your head high.

Sent from my SM-A217F using Tapatalk

Some people won’t like you as they are struggling to like themselves.

Life is just too short for that sort of toxicity.

I too thought it was about a DD in JC cycle i.e. 1st through 3rd year, but then some people get stuck in that mentality.

I'm sorry you are going through this but you are better off without them.

If the original messages were drink-fueled, then the least they could have done is apologised and deleted them. Idiots are always idiots though.

Jesus what nasty bitches. You are better off without those kind of ‘friends’ in your life. I know it’s hard now but remember you are a better person than them and would you really want them as friends? I’d find a relationship like that too stressful and I’d constantly wonder what they would be saying about me being my back.
Suck mean girl behaviour and I’d be disappointed if it was my 14 year old carrying on like that .

Post Deleted

Grown adults can still be so childlike. I saw some comments last year on the school whatsapp which is usually fairly safe and tame and it made me realise that a few adults that I tend to like can still act in a way I really don't get. They were slagging off the teacher and I found it really childish and poorly judged on a group of 30 parents. Fair enough at the school gate, a quiet moan but they really have no idea who knows who and who they could be upsetting.

That is really tough - sorry to hear. Great advice above. Take care of yourself.

Thank you everyone. It still really hurts but I know I wouldn't go back there. The girl in question, they all dropped her too and she is also devastated Harder for her as she sees a lot of them socially (kids hang out together etc.) Her and I are still friends. I do have some distance, which is good. It is tougher for her. She is friends with them a lot longer than me (she grew up with 3 of them). I am just baffled that other women could hurt each other like this

I think you will look back in years to come and realise that you have had a lucky escape.

From what you have said, what these women did was really nasty and this wasn't a fallout due to a misunderstanding or a storm-in-a-teacup.

Losing this group will free you up to find better friends.

People are so strange. Similar happened a good friend of mine. In a group of life long friends, one hurt her, not maliciously exactly but really let her down. She pulled this person on it. All her other friends insisted she was overreacting, it was nothing. She would have been happy with an acknowledgement from the good friend who was at fault. Instead, the rest of the group just ended friendship with her. It was incredibly hurtful for her. Her main group of friends from young. Everything they had been through for years counted for nothing apparently. The group were angry that she dare express hurt at what they considered harmless. So that was it. It affected her for long. Destroyed her confidence really . And she is such a lovely kind decent person. They all knew that but still acted like this towards her.
It was so cruel really. I honestly couldn't understand how people who knew exactly how she was and had been hanging around together since early teens treated her so badly. And yet they did.
Better off without people like that. It is awful because it is so incomprehensible I think. My friend struggled with it so much. But it's really a reflection on them, not you.
It's crap and very hurtful though but you just have to move on and be thankful you are not like them.

OP That must be very hurtful.
When you contacted the one member, who denied a problem existed, when obviously there is one, I suspect that attempts to clear the air will go nowhere.
They have behaved badly, but rather than acknowledge it, they have deflected the blame onto you.
Do you really want to be friends with people like that?
Out of curiosity, is the original recipient of the WhatsApp message still involved with them? Did they apologise to her?
It hurts because you have done nothing wrong, and the others must know that. But there are a lot of toxic people out there
Be the bigger person.
Smile, say hello but I would keep my distance from people like that.

Sorry this happened to you. It’s something you see with teenagers and some women continue on like this ..bet there is one or two strong characters and the others don’t want to be the next target so easier to turn on you.

What about the girl they originally targeted? Did she stay friends with them

Hold your head up high. There are plenty out there not like that so hopefully you will make more friends who are nicer to each other

Sorry this has happened
I always find comfort in the saying
When someone shows you who they are Believe them

And it kind of makes me feel a little less wounded but it really sucks

Standing up for your friend was the right thing to do. Don’t regret that.

As my dad says ‘Some people won’t like you but they are the wrong type of people.’

Let them off. 1 good fiend is better than 8 assholes. All the best x